Signs Of A toxic relationship – how to avoid unhealthy relationship – It is extremely hurtful when you let someone in your life and then later realize that it was a bad decision. Toxic relationships can come in any form and a romantic relationship is also among these relationships that can turn toxic and dangerous. Sometimes, men and women are involved in some highly toxic relationships without even realizing it.
Toxic relationships can not only cause damage to you mentally but if you are involved in a relationship with the wrong person, it might also affect you physically. This is the reason you need to access and get out of a toxic relationship.
One way to avoid the toxic relationship is to learn how to identify the traits that are abnormal. Very few of us are able to identify and step out of such relationships so if you too are concerned about this, here’s how you can do it. Here are some tips that can help you identify whether your lover or S.O is toxic for you or not.
Your Partner is Just Uninterested in You
Do you often find yourself cherishing the sweet and romantic memories you shared with your S.O? Is it because you are no longer the same with your partner? May be it’s because your partner is no more interested in you. This is a red flag that signifies that your partner has begun to give up on the relationship.
If they don’t argue with you like previously, if they no more want to discuss things that are really important it’s because they don’t really care much. This is one of the terrible circumstances for a couple as your S.O has grown out of love and won care about your feelings and you, on the other hand will feel hurt and vulnerable.
If this is the issue with you, take some time and think about it. Also if you are willing to repair the relationship, it’s important to have a meaningful conversation with your partner. Ask your partner is he/she is okay. Let them open up in front of you.
Instead of directly blaming them for their disengagement in relationship, try to let them open up and share their feelings. You’ll be able to sort things out without getting mean to each other and you might get to know things that have made your partner behave in this manner. If they don’t respond well to this, you need to avoid trying to repair the relationship.
You have a Controlling and Manipulative Partner
Independence and freedom is an extremely important aspect in a romantic relationship. Being a couple means two people should make decisions together and not take decisions for each other. If your partner is controlling and is the in charge of everything you do or are willing to do, it’s no correct.
If your partner is being controlling and doesn’t let you make your own decisions be it your order at a restaurant or a major decision like changing your job, it’s a toxic relationship.
When you feel like your partner has become manipulative and controlling suddenly, there has to be a strong reason behind it. Talk to your partner about this without making them feel bad. If their controlling behavior is because they want to keep you safe and away from troubles, it can be fixed but if it’s how they are, it cannot be fixed and they’ll turn even more controlling as your relationship progresses. If they are trying to change you and control your life, let the relationship go and maintain distance from them.
Your partner Shames and Insults you
This is one of the prominent signs of an unhealthy and toxic relationship. When people grow out of love and they are not interested in their spouses, some may inhibit bad behavior. If you constantly feel like a vulnerable and bad person after interacting with your spouse or while spending time with them, the problem is not within you but it lies within them.
If your spouse uses bad language for you, criticizes your decisions, your character, your choices and almost everything you do, it’s a sign that they are toxic people. Toxic partners shame their spouses in front of other people, yell and judge in front of other people. This also includes saying hurtful jokes about you.
If you are often hurt by their comments and behavior, it’s time to reevaluate your relationship. The person who shames you doesn’t deserve your attention and if this has become a constant thing, you should probably stay away from them. You need a person who respects you and doesn’t let you down in front of others. If your partner is not willing to improve this and doesn’t listen to you, the best idea is to get out of such a toxic relationship.
Your Partner Holds Meaningless Grudges
When you are in love, you often forgive the mistakes of your spouse and move on but when your partner doesn’t move on and holds grudges, it’s a red flag. If your spouse brings up the past issues again and again, this clearly reflects that they haven’t gotten over it and they hold grudges. When a person holds grudges, here’s no space for forgiveness and this may lead to increased toxicity in a relationship. They’ll keep hurting you about the same issues and will also keep fighting with you about the same issues.
When a person can’t get over the conflicts and issues over time, it can lead into a toxic relationship later. If this happens once or twice, you can sit and talk to your partner about it but if it doesn’t improve with time and if your partner is not ready to understand, you need to save yourself from the relationship. If there are a lot of conflicts for which holding grudges is not reasonable, it may be because you’re your relationship is turning into a toxic relationship.
You Live in Constant Fear
If you are always in fear about how your partner will react to your decisions, your choices, your matters or anything you do, it’s because you are in a toxic relationship. If you can’t be yourself or be free to do thing you like just because of the fear of your partner, it’s because he is a control freak and an insensitive person who doesn’t understand you.
If you are afraid of how your spouse will react to the messages of other people in your phone, or about how your parents behave with them, or even about your decision to go out with your friends, is because you are already in a toxic relationship.
A person who truly loves you won’t let you live like this. The healthy relationships sustain on the basis of trust and proper communication and if you partner is just not willing to listen to you and simply bursts out when they done like something you did, it’s not appropriate.
In this case, you’ll also avoid things that you like to do just because of the fear of your spouse. Not only you are restricting yourself, but you are also giving a chance to a toxic relationship that may get even more horrible with time. So keep yourself away from them and live your life freely.
Your Partner is Excessively Dependent on you
When your partner becomes excessively dependent on you, you’ll start to feel trapped and aged. When you always have to be the one who understands everything and the mature one, you’ll start to lose yourself. When a partner is struggling with self-esteem issues or doesn’t want to be responsible, you’ll be the one who will have to do all the work in a relationship and you’ll get frustrated of this role.
This is a kind of toxic relationship because sooner or later, you’ll get tired. After all, you wanted to be the ultimate companion or a loving partner, not a servant. You’ll also feel guilty about not giving any priority to yourself or doing things that you want.
When you lose yourself in a relationship, the relationship will turn toxic and unwanted at some point. When you stop caring about your goals, your wishes, and your dreams just because you have to handle the dreams and needs of someone who is wholly dependent on you, it will drive you crazy.
It is extremely important to care for yourself and thus, you should talk to your partner about this. If they don’t consider or don want to listen to you, don’t stretch the relationship and free yourself from it.
A relationship grows and nurtures in an environment of love, care, respect, and safety. If you are in a relationship, you don’t have to feel trapped or insecure or guilty. To build a lasting relationship, it requires a lot of efforts but you don’t have to keep forcing yourself to make a relationship work.
Toxic relationships can cause you to feel vulnerable, guilty, unsafe and frustrated and if you are already feeling so, you are in a toxic relationship and you should free yourself from it.